Dear 2015

Dear 2015,

I am not sad to see you end and am hopeful for this next year. You have been a difficult, but blessed year. When the ball dropped in 2015 I truly believed you would be an amazing year. My goals included reading 50 books, reaching my goal weight, running a 5k, getting through the one difficulty in my marriage, and getting my finances in better order. However, you had other plans and there were some difficult times lying ahead for me.

• In the end of January, I was fired from my job.
• Then my husband decided our marriage was over the first part of May.
• My divorce was final in October.
• Someone I love dearly told me they were sick. It is treatable, but still scary. 

This list may seem short, but these were all very difficult things for me. A divorce is a process with all of the paperwork, the lawyers, family, friends, and the heartbreak. Eventually I will share these details, but not in this post. The heartbreak was the worst part. Unfortunately, I did not see him leaving coming even if I can look back now and see some of the signs. I never in a million years believed he would just give up and walk out. 

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Even with the trials of 2015 the blessings have been amazing. In April, I found an amazing job and I love it. They treat their clients and their employees with the utmost respect. I am loving it and continue to learn everyday. 

There are not enough words for me to ever express how thankful I am for all the kindness and love I have received while going through my separation and divorce. I don't know what I have ever done to have so many people show so much love for me. Thank you to all of you who were there to let me know what I was feeling, the nightmares, the tears, and so much more were normal. Thank you!!!

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I have been so blessed for all of the love from family and friends. I am blessed to have a church that has accepted me like family. I am thankful that even with all of the shame I felt that I was not treated that way. I am blessed not to have been blamed. I am blessed to have made new friends. I am blessed! I look forward to 2016. I am hopeful for what I am to learn and accomplish in 2016. 

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What blessings have you had in 2015? What are you hopeful for in 2016?

December Favorites

December has been an emotional month for me. I didn't expect it to be as difficult for me as it was, but I continue to move forward. I just take it a day at a time. Here are my five December favorites:

1. Coloring the Psalms - I have been reading the Psalms and found this coloring book on amazon. To say I like the adult coloring books might be an understatement. A few people received coloring books from me for a Christmas present this year.

2. Minion PJ's - I love minions! I bought some fleece minion pj pants on Black Friday. A couple of nights I have put on my minion pj pants and just colored. I needed to shut my mind off and relax!

3. Christmas Lights - I love Christmas lights. Can't help it. There is something magical about the twinkling lights in the evening. Love them.

4. Naps - I love naps! It has been nice to enjoy them over the past few weeks. I need to get my schedule in check for the New Year; however; it has been nice to enjoy them!

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5. Podcasts - I have been enjoying listening to podcasts. I have been enjoying multiple podcasts while working, driving, getting ready in the morning, and running (when it happens). Some of the podcasts I have been enjoying is All the Books!, Detective, Criminal, The Jillian Michaels Show, and Serial.

What are your favorites this month?

December Goals & November Recap

It is hard to believe it is December. Christmas is in less then 20 days and my living room is littered with boxes of gifts being delivered from Amazon and my tubs of Christmas decorations waiting to be put up. I really enjoyed going on vacation, but it has left me feeling behind. I am hoping to "catch up" this next week. 

I'll begin by posting my goals for December. :)

November Goals:

• Re-write my list of why I want to loose weight & be healthy
• Continue to get up & get workouts in 5+ times per week
• Write blogs more frequently about rebuilding myself, divorce, weight loss
• Read at least 2 books on health & nutrition

The only goal in November completed was reading two books on health and nutrition. I read Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst and The Habits of 7 Highly Successful Juicers by Angela VonBuelow and Shane Whaley. They were both good and I will do a short review later this week. 

   

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Prior to leaving for vacation I realized that I have been waiting to just go back to where I was prior to Brandon leaving. This whole time I have just been waiting for the click to get back into my workouts, to eat healthy, to blog again, etcetera. Cooking for one has been difficult for me too. Thankfully I am not where I was when I originally started three years ago, but I need to go back to some of my older goals and work my way up to where I living healthier. So here are my goals for the next month.

December Goals:

• Have my Christmas Cards ready to mail by 12/14/15
• Get under 180 pounds and stay there
• Cook and/or back 2-3 times per week
• Workout 4 times per week
• Blog once a week
• Read 2 or more books 

What are your health goals this month? General goals?

November Favorites

This month flew by for me personally. I cannot believe it is Christmas time! I love the twinkling lights and the Christmas spirit. Here are my November favorites:

1. Scorpion - I haven't watched this TV show since Season 2 started this fall. I forgot how much I love this show. It is about a group of geniuses who help the FBI. The situations they get into and the things they say crack me up though.

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2. Apricot Oil - This is amazing! I have sensitive skin. It has been awful this past year. I have realized over the past year that when I am extremely stressed I break out in hives. Sexy, I know. It is itchy and awful. This spring when I broke out in hives I had to take steroids, use a steroid cream, shower every other day, and take two antihistamines. So when it happened again with splotches of eczema I was concerned I would have to go on the hated steroids again.

I was trying everything when I went to visit my step-sister. She manages a Resort & Spa and they recommended Apricot Body Oil. It is the only thing I have come across that has stopped the itching and my skin has started to heal for the first time since September. Thank you God!

3. Starbucks Carmel Hot Apple Cider - I have enjoyed two of these this past week. It tastes like an apple pie! Yummy! Generally I only have them a couple times in a year so two times in a week is my limit.

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4. "Leggings Ain't Pants" - Have you seen this? She is hilarious, but she is telling the truth.

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5. Dark Chocolate Almonds - I am not an almond, peanut, cashew, or pecan person. They are okay, but I would personally rather have something else. However, these Dark Chocolate Almonds are delicious! They help kill my craving and I don't feel like they are horrible for me. You should try them! Tell me what you think!

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What is one of your favorites this month?

Excuses

I have been listening to podcasts lately and listened to an interview on Half Size Me with Biggie Fit. It was an interesting podcast so I watched some of his videos. I came across his video about making a list of excuses. Honestly, I am continuing to have trouble with getting my workouts in and eating back on track. So, I made a list.

1. I'm tired!
2. Headache/Migraine
3. Time - I'm buy with other things
4. I just don't feel like it
5. It isn't easy (especially food)
6. Divorce Crap
7. Because I don't have to
8. I deserve to take time off
9. I deserve to eat what I want
10. I don't feel well (sore, nauseas, etc)
11. Weather
12. I am not ready
13. There isn't enough time (less than 60 minutes to workout)
14. I'm hungry & don't want to prep/cook
15. How do I cook for one
16. Negative thoughts (I'm not worthy; feeling like a failure)
17. Depending on when I do have time; I'm gross afterwards (sweaty)
18. I seem to have a mental/emotional block
19. No self control

I am not sure if this had any impact on me. I know these are all just excuses. The headaches/migraines I believe to be legitimate; however, the rest are crap. It was interesting to see them all written out and where my focus needs to be from this list.

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I believe the one that is hurting me the most are the negative thoughts. This is something I thought I would just snap out of and go back to the way I was doing things before my ex-husband left me. I have realized this week I am going to have to rebuild myself again. Thankfully I do not have to start from where I was 2-3 years ago, but I will have to begin again. 

What are your excuses?

November Goals & October Recap

I have to say I am sick of writing these posts. I am tired of telling everyone about how I fail at my weight loss and goals every month. At the same time, I realize I have been through a lot. Either way, I keep going. Eventually I will write about my successes and I will begin to loose weight again. One day. Sigh!

Either way here is how my October went and what I hope to accomplish in November.

October Goals:

• Concentrate on being & eating healthy
• Continue to workout 5-6 times per week
• Re-write a list of why I want to reach my goal weight
• Write 5 posts in October

October sucked! Let's just be real. My divorce was final this month and there were multiple nights of emotional eating and pity parties. I have been doing better with working out, but I have a long way to go to be back where I was at before my ex-husband walked out on me. 

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November Goals:

• Re-write my list of why I want to loose weight & be healthy
• Continue to get up & get workouts in 5+ times per week
• Write blogs more frequently about rebuilding myself, divorce, weight loss
• Read at least 2 books on health & nutrition

What are your goals for the next month?

October Favorites

I previously said in my July Favorites post that Quest bars were a favorite. However, they have recently changed their ingredients making them not as healthy and not a favorite for me anymore. To be honest, it sucks! These were a healthy treat for me and I went for them to help my unhealthy cravings. Hopefully they hear the complaints of everyone and go back to their original ingredients. Here's hoping! 

Anyways... my favorites for October:

1. Cookie Butter - I went to Trader Joe's for the first time and had to get the Cookie Butter after hearing so much about it. Apples dipped in cookie butter have been one of my favorite snacks. 

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2. 100 Thank You's - I saw this video on A Blog About Love and loved it. We don't take time to appreciate each other nearly enough. This is something we should all strive to do more.

3. Bible Pens - I ordered these off the great Amazon due to their reviews and love them. They do not bleed through the pages and they don't smear if you don't swipe them immediately. Personally, I only use the purple to underline and the black pen to write notes.

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4. Aveeno Lotion - This lotion is one that actually works for me and I am extremely picky. I am sensitive to smells and I hate greasy lotions. My skin is dry and sensitive though so I need to keep it hydrated. It has taken years, but I love this one. 

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5. Nyx High Voltage Lipstick - I am not a lipstick person, but have been on a search for a great one. I really like this one! The color actually stays on where I feel a lot of other lipsticks come off immediately. I love the colors Wine & Dine and the French Kiss.

October was a little crazy. I was emotional with my 7 year wedding anniversary on October 4th and our divorce being finalized five days later on October 9th. It was an emotional time. I am working to find myself again as this year comes to a close and I begin to think of a new year beginning soon. :)

How was your October? What were your favorites this month? Leave me a reply below on what I need to check out!